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Where has all the romance gone, you ask? In days of olde, fair damsels were quite happy to accept the seminal discharge of their very special and exclusive lover. Albeit, times have changed, and the silly love songs of Paul McCartney seem just that. Do we blame it on cell phone technology? Facebook? The seventh season of 24? Now we have girls such as Lena Julliett picking out their Romeos like stalks of celery at the supermarket where crispness and expiration date are more the selling point than the ability to play the lute, wear tights and compose sonnets. Then theres the numbers factor. Like a toilet paper sale at Costco, Lena gets her men in the handy, thrifty ten-pack. Then another factor comes into play. Lenas a hot blooded cum-loving Latin woman, and today is Cinco de Mayo where vaginas from south of the border take a what-the-fuck attitude. Ole.

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